Miracle Twins

Two weeks ago we announced to the world that we are adopting twin baby boys! YAY!!

We were amazed and humbled by all the love and support we felt from friends and family! I've read through everyone's comments more than once and am overwhelmed by how many amazing people we have in our lives. We had a lot of people say, "we had no idea you were adopting!" And well, that's because our adoption story isn't your typical adoption story. :) So, for all of you wondering how this came about I thought I'd share our miraculous story. (Warning it might be a little, or a lot, long)

Most people know that Jeremy and I have been trying to start our family for five years. It's been a roller coaster of emotions and at times has left me feeling completely broken and defeated. Well about a year and a half ago I felt prompted to write about my struggles with infertility on my blog, since a lot of people didn't really know what we were going through. I also made my first phone call to LDS Family Services (LDSFS) to inquire about the adoption process. (See post from 9/26/12) I was emailed all the paperwork to be able to start signing up for adoption but days past, weeks past, months past and I just never filled them out. Fear paralyzed me and while I thought about adoption constantly I never filled out the paperwork or started the process. What I didn't know at the time was that Heavenly Father had a plan for us and things were already set in motion to get us where we are today. My sister Jessica's mother-in-law, Ann, read my post about our infertility and struggles to start our family, and recently told me that her heart broke for us and she vowed to herself that if there was ever anything she could do to help us achieve our dream of having a family that she would do it. (She's amazing) Now, fast forward a year to the Summer of 2013. I started feeling very strongly that we needed to start getting approved through LDSFS for adoption. I felt an urgency, same as the urgency I felt when I realized I needed to serve a mission. Unfortunately, I didn't heed the prompting and let myself get too busy with work, our new house, and life in general. In September, I was at work when my sister, Jessica, started blowing up my phone. She called me a few times, left me a voicemail and texted me that she really needed to talk to me. My heart dropped as I was positive something bad had happened to someone in our family and she was calling to tell me about it. I asked my supervisor if I could step out of the office for a minute and call my sister back since I thought there was a family emergency. Well when I called her back she answered the phone saying, "Hey how's it going?" LOL, that helped calm my heart a little since I figured if someone were in the hospital she wouldn't be so nonchalant about things. But then as she proceeded to tell me why she had been calling my heart started beating so hard I thought it would break through my chest. Her mother-in-law Ann had been in contact that day with someone who knew a girl who was pregnant with twins and was going to be putting them up for adoption. She wanted to know if we would be interested. I believe my response was, "Um, YES YES YES we would be interested." My hands were shaking, my heart was pounding and something was telling me this could be a changing point in our lives. You see, about a week before Jessica called me about the twins I had a strange dream where I knew I was having a baby but I was only pretending that I was pregnant.  In the dream I knew I wasn't actually pregnant but I also knew with a certainty that I was expecting a child. It was a very vivid dream and I remember telling Jeremy about it the next day. That's when he explained to me that he'd been having the impression over and over again that something big was about to happen for us. He had no idea what it was but he just kept feeling something tell him, "get ready, something big is going to happen." At the time we didn't really know what all of this meant but after talking to Jessica that September day all these thoughts and experiences came flooding back into my memory. I called to tell Jeremy about my conversation with Jessica and we both got so excited thinking about the possibility of being able to grow our family through adoption. We started praying for the birth mother and her family daily and as we prayed we were AMAZED how much we started to love this birth mother and babies, even though we knew practically nothing about them and hadn't had any contact with them. We told our parents about the possibility but decided to keep it quiet just because we knew it was a long shot that it would work out. For a few weeks after our initial conversation Jessica would call and give me updates about things that Ann had learned but soon the updates stopped all together. We continued to pray for them but knew that this probably wouldn't work out for us. We discussed that maybe this experience was just trying to push us to finally take action to start our family, whether by signing up for adoption or by starting fertility treatments.

In early December I talked to a friend who had done in-vitro out here in Louisville and successfully conceived a baby. She told us all about her doctor and how much it cost and we decided that right after New Years we would start fertility treatments. We also realized in December that Jeremy was eligible for a student loan that we had previously been told he wasn't eligible for because of his military scholarship. The loan amount was exactly what we needed to do the fertility treatments so we decided to go for it. We secured the money and on the SAME day that I was going to call the fertility clinic to set up my first appointment I got a call from Ann! She called and said that she had just met the birth mother of the twins in person and had talked to her for quite a while. She explained to me that she had chosen a different family to be the adoptive parents but had just found out that week that the family she chose had become pregnant and were no longer going to adopt the twins. Once again our names were brought up and Ann was calling to say that she wasn't sure what was going to happen but that we needed to get our booties in gear and get approved through LDSFS for adoption ASAP. After my conversation with her, Jeremy and I both knew that this was what we needed to do. The next day we started filling out the adoption application paperwork so that we could get approved in case she decided to choose us. For anyone who isn't familiar with the adoption process, getting approved to adopt can take quite a while. There are literally hundreds of papers to fill out, fingerprinting, numerous background checks (criminal, child abuse, FBI etc), interviews, letters of reference, medical physicals, and home studies. Luckily Jeremy was out of school for a few weeks because he had just started his Christmas break, and he was amazing! He made all the phone calls, filled out the paperwork and scheduled everything while I was at work during the day. I would come home and he would just show me where to sign. :) I love that man! Miracle after miracle started happening and we could see that everything was falling into place just as it was supposed to. One of my favorite miracle stories had to do with obtaining an infertility report from my doctor. LDSFS requires that a doctor fill out a form documenting the fact that we have fertility problems. Well the last doctor I had seen about all of this was back in Idaho. I looked him up on the internet so that I could find the number to his practice and call to have them fill it out. Well I found out that he was no longer at that practice. My heart dropped because if I was going to have to set up an appointment out here to get diagnosed all over again it was going to take a lot more time and money. I decided to call the practice that he had been at anyway to see if another doctor could review my charts and fill it out for us. The office lady I spoke with didn't make any promises but told me to fax over the paperwork and she would see what she could do. I faxed everything over and called back the next day to check on the status of things. The woman I spoke to the day before was excited and said, "You'll never believe what happened! Right after I spoke with you yesterday Dr. Christensen (my former doctor who no longer practiced there) unexpectedly stopped by. When I told him about your situation he pulled your chart and filled out the paperwork himself!" Friends, I have really gained a testimony that most things aren't a coincidence and that Heavenly Father really is leading and directing our lives. Another miracle had to do with our fingerprinting. Anyone who's been fingerprinted knows it can sometimes take a while to get the results back. Well we decided to pay a little more to do digital fingerprinting and before we made it home from our appointment to do that we already had our results!! We also decided to take a risk and reach out to the birth mother through Facebook. I was so afraid that she would feel like we were intruding or being pushy but it ended up being the best decision. A day after we sent her a message on Facebook she responded and that kickstarted our relationship with her. Let me just tell you that she is incredible! We absolutely adore her and her family. We have been able to FaceTime a few times and have met most of her family and they are all wonderful. We honestly feel like we have won the adoption jackpot!

We have been in contact with the birth mother since about a week before Christmas and have been mainly emailing back and forth. Well about two weeks ago she emailed us and said she wanted to FaceTime again because she had some questions for us. I was excited to FaceTime again but nervous about what questions she might have. We had been very open with one another and had been answering questions through our emails so I was feeling a little apprehensive about what big monstrous difficult questions she might have for us! :) I set up our computer on the night that we had planned to FaceTime and nervously paced the house until she called.

When she called we chatted for a few minutes and then things went quiet and I waited for a big tough question. The birth mom smiled and said, "Well I don't really have any questions for you guys. I just wanted to tell you in person that I would like you guys to be the parents of my babies!" I broke down crying and it felt as if fireworks were exploding within me! We were SO SUPER DUPER excited! Finally, something that we'd hoped and prayed for for years was happening! Not only that but we were being blessed to adopt twins! I don't think we went to bed until 1am that night and even then I don't think I was able to sleep more than a few minutes. So that pretty much brings you up to the present day! We are still as giddy as can be and have been having so much fun preparing the nursery and getting things ready for their arrival. We found out after her doctors appointment yesterday that they are each about 3 lbs and if she can make it to March like the doctors are expecting (her official due date is 4/15/14) they should be close to 6 lbs each! They are growing wonderfully and everything looks great with their little bodies.

So if you were one of those wondering why you didn't know we were trying to adopt, now hopefully you understand why. We are now officially approved to adopt through LDSFS (only took a month from start to finish). Now comes the preparation, baby showers, stocking up on diapers and formula, and waiting for delivery day! Since the birth mother lives in Utah we will be flying out there as soon as she goes into labor and will be staying as long as we need to.

And to everyone still struggling with infertility and trying desperately to start or add to their families please know you are in my prayers. I understand how heartbreaking it is. But please know that Heavenly Father has a plan for you too. A quote we have framed in our house to remind us daily of this is from Elder Holland which says, "Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don't come until heaven; but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come."

We are excited for our two little blessings to join our family and to meet all of you! Thanks for all your love and support!